A toxic relationship at times are very quiet. I always encourage couples to talk things out to talk about everything. Talk about the hard stuff, talk about feelings. Let it be perfectly clear how you both are feeling at any given time so that you can use that as a starting off point to get to where you want to be in your relationship. One of the most harmful things you can do is to shut down, withdraw, and be silent, especially about things that matter to your relationship with your partner. What is the price of silence?
Being in a toxic relationship doesn’t always mean fighting aggressively. When you fail to communicate with your partner, you risk losing your close connection. You risk assumptions and misunderstandings that happen when one or both of you don’t make your feelings clear. These issues that you’re not talking about will grow in the silence until they can overtake your relationship if they remain unresolved.
When you keep silent about what is important to you apprehensions grow, resentments grow. That seemingly small thing that you’re keeping quiet about can create anger in the silence because you may not feel that you can talk about it, and if you do, maybe your partner won’t understand, or maybe they’ll judge you, maybe they’ll oppose you and it will be a big hassle or fight so why bother, right? I want you to reject these ideas and instead look at it in a positive light.
Give your partner some credit for being a loving and kind person. If you don’t feel like they’re giving the proper weight or attention to something, gently point that out to them. Without talking about these concerns your healthy relationship can become a toxic relationship. Let them know you have something you need to share and you’re worried about it. Open up and be vulnerable to them. This is the person you love; your person. You trust them with your heart, you can trust them with your fears and your problems too. The best thing about being in a love relationship is having someone to share those burdens and solve those problems with so you don’t have to do it alone.
If you’re worried say so. Let it out. Put it on the table and let your partner be aware of how you’re feeling. Bottling it up and keeping quiet about it will only do you harm. Stress and worry are a huge contributor to medical issues and mental health challenges. If you don’t have to, why would you bring this into your life and your relationship? Bring everything out in the open and talk about it. Your partner deserves for you to give them the benefit of the doubt and to be trusted with your vulnerability. It can be scary to admit that you feel weak or scared, but in this world we’re living in today, we have some very valid reasons to feel this way
Your partner can’t read your mind and they may assume your silence is about them when it isn’t, or that you are feeling some way about them that you don’t. This can be the source of a toxic relationship. Our minds can run away with us when it’s not clear what’s really going on. Put it all out there and encourage your partner to do the same. When you are unified and you are close you can tackle all your problems and many times solve them together.
I’m not suggesting that you go on and on about your problems constantly because we all know someone who does that and that person is not pleasant to be around. What I am suggesting is that you intentionally sit down together and talk about those issues that you may be holding back on. Get on the same page and work together to find your way around or through whatever is in your way. Be open and vulnerable; be kind and helpful to each other. You won’t regret it, and it will improve many aspects of your life and relationship,
